Well, so far, the thread has highlighted one of the biggest systemic problems with DV.
Unless you know personally how soul destroying a toxic relationship can be, there is no way to begin to understand that DV is the 'visible' tip of a mutually painful progressivly destructive relationship spiral.
Jerry, your experience with youe ex girlfriend would be a simple starting pount of one type of a dangerous relationship.
if I develop the progression, you might begin to see the potential long term pattern. DV is not the result of bad men who always go around hitting and killing women, except cases of extreme psychopathy. It is mor likely a outcome of long term psychological abuse. And it might be the female or the male that causes the physical harm in the end. It might also be either party that runs the mental abuse.