red750

A guy hears a noise outside at his shed. He looks out the window and sees a burglar trying to break ito the shed. H equickly calls 000 and explains the situation. The operator says "Sorry sir, we have no resources to send." The guy looks out again, and says, "You have to come. He's stealing my mower." The oparator again says," I told you sir, we have no resources to send." Then the guy says, "Oh, don't worry about it, I just shot the twat. He's dead on the lawn.' Within five minutes, there were two helicopters, six police cars and fourteen police swarming around his house. There was no body on the lawn. The police said, "Sir, you lied to us. You didn't shoot anyone." The guy said, "You started it by saying you had no resources."

We used to have empires, run by emporers. Then we had kingdoms, run by kings. Now we just have countries, .........

https://www.facebook.com/reel/4385148998399680

God promised there would be good obedient wives in all corners of the world - - - then he made the world round.

Terrifying. https://www.facebook.com/reel/1054668937522429

I went to the library the other day. I said to the librarian, "Do you have any books on shelving?" She said, "Yes, all of them."

https://www.facebook.com/reel/517150481340768

https://www.facebook.com/reel/1709372753633243

https://www.facebook.com/reel/1996855887752696

You can always tell if a guy masterbates a lot by looking at his hand. You'll see a wedding ring.

I was going to get tested to see if I had ADHD, but I got distracted and did other things, so I guess I don't have it.

I like the standup routines of this guy. His name is Ismo, and he is Finnish. His subject is coming to grips with the English language. This is a Facebook clip, so you may need to have a FB account to view itm. If you can view it without a FB account, please let me know in a reply. When the video opens, click on the speaker icon in the top left corner to unmute. https://www.facebook.com/reel/1882203019080271 https://www.facebook.com/reel/481031471632696 Note - at the end it replays.

I saw a report where Australia has one of the highest proportions of household rooftop solar panels, but not so industry that uses a lot of power. The government has announced new incentive bonuses for factories and sheds to have panels implemented.

https://www.msn.com/en-au/news/other/trump-s-latest-political-blunder-was-a-bad-one/ss-AA29zBS9?ocid=msedgntp&pc=LCTS&cvid=6a75a39fb912406fa10f474a2a30d022&ei=10#image=12

Mine are from the two guys sitting on a dock, Logan Lisle and the other guy, his brother Matt. logan lisle.mp4