If I had a Time Machine, I would ...

[old man emu]

What would you do if you had a Time Machine? (Just remember that this thread is in the Funnies section).

 

If I had a Time Machine, I would go back to the first bloke who exhibited male pattern baldness, and castrate him.

 

OME

 

 

[nomadpete]

I'd go back to the first origin of the first universe. Just to watch it.

 

 

[Marty_d]

I'd go back to the first origin of the first universe. Just to watch it.

That'd be a good one.

 

I'd nip over to Britain at the end of WWII and pay cash for a dozen Spitfires, and a block of land in Utah in my grandfather's name to bury them in. Is there room in the time machine for the equipment to shrink wrap them?

 

 

[bexrbetter]

I would take just a little longer with all those girls.

 

I'd go back to the first origin of the first universe. Just to watch it.

Just turn an older valve TV off and stare at the white dot in the middle.

 

 

[Jerry_Atrick]

Everytime I met a girl I like, I would go forward in time to see how they turn out....

 

 

[old man emu]

I'd nip over to Britain at the end of WWII and pay cash for a dozen Spitfires, and a block of land in Utah in my grandfather's name to bury them in. Is there room in the time machine for the equipment to shrink wrap them?

Sorry, Marty_d but that post was a FAIL.

 

You were supposed to post a funny reply. But the idea is sound.

 

 

[facthunter]

Yes Merlins make a nice SOUND. People tell me they should have kept the BSA Bantam they sold for $5. Being smart in retrospect isn't that promising if you wish to be different. IF everyone kept all this stuff it wouldn't be rare and valuable, either. Nev

 

 

[rgmwa]

Just turn an older valve TV off and stare at the white dot in the middle.

You've pushed the lever the wrong way Bex. That would be the end of the universe, not the origin.

 

rgmwa

 

 

[bexrbetter]

That would be the end of the universe, not the origin.

Well that's been captured on film in that stunning documentary, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

 

I like your presumption that you know what the "beginning" looked like btw, why wouldn't it have been all space with a single shining point of energy?

 

 

[octave]

I would go back and test the grandfather paradox (not with my grandfather but with yours Bex)

 

 

[Marty_d]

Sorry, Marty_d but that post was a FAIL.You were supposed to post a funny reply. But the idea is sound.

Hmmm. Now you may not have noticed, OME, but I just slipped back in time and impregnated your grandmother.

 

Now show some respect to your grandfather!

 

 

[rgmwa]

I like your presumption that you know what the "beginning" looked like btw, why wouldn't it have been all space with a single shining point of energy?

No, what I saw couldn't have been the beginning. That point just faded away every time I watched it.

 

My theory is that in the beginning, God created a test pattern.

 

rgmwa

 

 

[bexrbetter]

I would go back and test the grandfather paradox (not with my grandfather but with yours Bex)

It could only end up with me being even better looking, if that were possible.

 

 

[PA.]

I would go forward in time and see who turned up at my funeral.

 

 

[facthunter]

It would work OK at a horse race meeting or footy if you are a betting person. I'm not a gambling person, but then It would not be a gamble then, just a superb unfair game changing advantage. Nev

 

 

[old man emu]

I wonder if, because a Time Traveler who knew the result of a race and put a sheep station on the winner, if that would change the starting odds, or the starting odds obtained would be as a result of the sheep station being laid.

 

 

[Marty_d]

I had this discussion with mates the other day. We figured that the best thing you could do is (modestly) use your knowledge of what's going to happen in the stock market - companies that succeed aren't as likely to be affected by small events, as chance events are. Shares in Microsoft, Facebook, Apple... couldn't go wrong.