Quickies part 2

[spacesailor]

Mercedes had a button to ' set' the seat & controls for each driver .

but

If the car lost power ( turn the key off ) , then you had to Replace that computer module.

spacesailor

 

[pmccarthy]

Nah, it remembered  unless you disconnected the battery or reset the system.

[spacesailor]

Hence ' Lase of power '.

One was reported (  in workshop  )  that the owner  switched of the ignition, as he had,

   "   forgotten  something ".

(  l have connections ), LoL

spacesailor

[old man emu]

I finally recognised whose voice is Siri's. 

 

My wife. She know bloody everything. 

[spacesailor]

Just checked my last post, AND ' what happened '  to my spellchecker .

Loss turned into lase, & off became 'of', ?.

Hopefully it still made sense.

spacesailor

 

[red750]

1 hour ago, spacesailor said:

Loss turned into lase, & off became 'of',

'of' is correct in that sentence, Spacey. 'of' is pronounced 'ov', and 'off' is the opposite of 'on'.

[old man emu]

40 minutes ago, red750 said:

'of' is correct in that sentence, Spacey. 'of' is pronounced 'ov', and 'off' is the opposite of 'on'.

Put some water with it, Red. Spacey was correct all along. "the owner switched off the ignition.

 

"Lase" verb (used without object): to give off coherent light, as in a laser. (Used in the field of Optics)

[red750]

I stand corrected. I thought he was referring to the first sentence in his post. I should have read further. My apologies, Spacey.

[spacesailor]

All,s good !.

 I Just didn,t write those two words.

Somehow they changed after l proof read ( red ) the post.

Woe is me. Putting words into my mouth !.

spacesailor

 

[old man emu]

6 hours ago, spacesailor said:

All,s good !.

But you still can't distinguish between the key immediately to the left of the <ENTER> key and the one to the immediate right of the <M> key.

 

The one beside the <ENTER> key is the one you want when All's good.😁

[spacesailor]

This one, ' l ' beside the' enter ' key. Lower case L no other option.

And ' , ' to the right of ' m ' .  ( Comer )

Or could l be using a different  keyboard layout  !.

I,m on a Galaxy tablet, the one with no usb socket.

And what on earth is this key, ' ¥ ' . A ' Y ' with two strike though lines ?.

Could it be the sign for  ' yen '  money.

spacesailor

 

 

 

[old man emu]

8 hours ago, spacesailor said:

Or could l be using a different  keyboard layout  !.

I think I have solved the dilemma. Nobody has shown you how to get the the other set of characters that has the numbers and punctuation marks.

[Bruce Tuncks]

3 dogs were in the vet's waiting room . "what are you here for?"  they asked the first dog...

"peeing," he replied..." I pee all the time everywhere".

"so what will they do?"

" they are going to take my balls off" said the dog.

The second dog then said " I'm here for digging too much, gosh I dig everywhere"

"and yes, they are going to take my balls off cos they say it will stop me digging"

They turned to the third dog... " I'm here for humping", ha said.

"just last week the missus was on her hands and knees doing the floor and I gave her a great humping"

"so they are gunna take your balls off?" asked another dog.

"no, I'm here to get my toenails trimmed", said the third dog.

[old man emu]

[Marty_d]

OME, print off a few hundred copies of that and pass them out at the next lockdown/anti-vaxxer/anti-5G rally (I reckon the usual suspects are at all of them).

 

Then watch as they all flatten their tyres.

[facthunter]

5G is likely to make your plane break up in the air.. Nev

[old man emu]

3 hours ago, facthunter said:

5G is likely to make your plane break up in the air.. Nev

Are you positive about that? I have a negative opinion.

[Marty_d]

8 hours ago, facthunter said:

5G is likely to make your plane break up in the air.. Nev

It doesn't feel good.  I've almost experienced it - 4.5G in a Pitts Special (I was a passenger).  My fingers swelled up like sausages.

[facthunter]

Have you got long arms? (You're not covered in FUR are you?) Actually a good plane will take more than 5G, Nev

[nomadpete]

Nev,

I don't think he was concerned about the resilience of the aircraft.

[willedoo]

I like the direction that G suit technology is moving in. The new system being developed for the Sukhoi Su-57 is predictive as opposed to the current reactive G suits. No doubt the Americans are on the same track. The way I understand it, the computers and sensors use a variety of data like altitude, speed, AOA, pilot weight, aircraft weight and centre of gravity and stick input to predict the upcoming G forces in a manoeuvre. The end result is correct pressure delivered to the suit right when it's needed rather than the usual slight lag. Designed for 9 G's. Apologies for thread drift; hopefully the next post will be funnier.

[red750]

My bank balance reads like a telephone number:  000

[red750]

                               
Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, 'Pour me a stiff one - just had                                  another fight with the little woman.'                                  

'Oh yeah?' said Charlie, 'And how did this one end?'

'When it was over,' Mike replied, 'She came to me on her hands and knees.'

'Really,' said Charles, 'Now that's a switch!   What did she say?'                                  

She said, 'Come out from under the bed,  you little chicken.'

[red750]

Take care all. With the Christmas upon us I would like to share a personal experience with my friends about drinking and driving. As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a "social session" out with friends. Well, last night I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather great CC’s n dries. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit. That's when I did something that I've never done before - I took a cab home. Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident. This was a real surprise as I had never driven a cab before, I don't know where I got it and now that it's in my garage I don't know what to do with it.  

 

(Copied from Facebook)

[facthunter]

That's quite an old one. Nev